“How did I end up here?”
Maybe you’ve been asking this question recently with all that has happened in our world over the last two years. While this is a worthy exploration, today I’ll be speaking more directly to one’s personal life.
Maybe you used to be much more outgoing, playful or adventurous and now… well not so much!
Without the proper tools to integrate and return to our centre we often make a temporary solution to a crisis a permanent fixture in our lives. Thus inviting imbalances into our relationships and our daily lives.
But there is always a way back to balance.
-
Your breakthrough reveals itself after your boundary has been laid.
-
When will you draw the line? When will enough be enough?
It was raining hard as I stumbled into the front yard of my childhood home. My shoes were water weights and my soul was blistering with the pain of my past. A bomb siren of heartache ripped through my chest. I knew something had to change.
“ENOUGH!”
I cried out in anger.
The earth moaned and the skies cleared.
I awoke from this dream and laid quietly in my bed. Something was different. I got up and looked around my room. Something had changed. Like a heavy backpack was removed and my spine was slowly correcting itself.
Walking around my room I felt lighter. I threw on my shoes and went for my workout. Pumping my favourite tunes and affirming myself and my freedom from my past.
Often in our times of pain or suffering we unconsciously choose to put on a heavy suit of armour. A way of protecting ourselves from ever experiencing something like that again.
This can be a belief, a pattern of behaviour or even an identity.
This way of being then becomes apart of us. Until one day the weight crushes our spirit or we let it go once and for all.
We turn and face that which we avoided and hid from. Now with determination and conviction, we make a declaration of a new beginning. “Enough is enough” and we integrate the lesson and grow from it.
This has been a repeating pattern in my life. One that I have come to appreciate when it presents itself. For I know that beyond the discomfort and pain of facing my patterns and fears, awaits an elevated state of being.
Freedom.
Let’s start simple…
Step 1
Recognize the loop or cycle.
This could be the moment where you get home and you have a drink or watch some television. It could be when you’re considering a relationship you know isn’t the best for you. You’ll know it’s an unhealthy loop or cycle by how your mind will go numb or become highly distracted.
It requires you to ignore the still and quiet voice inside of you that is always there but can be so easily brushed aside.
One of the simplest examples of this for me is when I go from checking my messages on my phone to taking a seat and scrolling the endless feed of social media. I know it’s in that moment that my mind has shifted into a self numbing mode.
It’s in the moment that I decide to sit down that I make the choice to go unconscious and repeat the cycle. And with every repetition the cycle becomes easier to fall into.
There will be reoccurring moments of decision for everyone. Some are simple daily occurrences and others are once in a lifetime opportunities to shift.
They are all an offer to take back your power and step out into the unknown thereby breaking the pattern of the past.
Step 2
“Enough!” Draw your line and act immediately. You must reach this point of heightened awareness to break the cycle.
This requires a higher level of energy. You must shift your energetic state in order to break the cycle. Everyone will require a different level of pain before they finally have had enough.
We all have the ability to shift our consciousness and therefore our energy in an instant. And yet so few of us use that ability break the cycles of self imprisoning patterns. Claim this power and use it.
Move your body. Use your voice. You must change your energy!
James Clear has a fantastic book called “Atomic Habits” with many great strategies outlined in it. As well as Dr. Joe Dispenza’s book, “Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself”.
Step 3
Affirm yourself and your new action.
As I wrote in my poem, “Build Your Belief”, you must see it in your mind and feel it in your heart in order to become it. Affirm your new destiny with sincerity, full faith and the joy of it already being accomplished.
This is as important as the previous two steps. Your acknowledgment and affirmation of your new state of being is what makes the shift a lasting one.
My strategy is to practice these steps on the simple patterns in my daily life. And as I master those moments again and again, I then find that the longer and larger cycles will emerge and give me the opportunity to shift in an even greater way.
Not all of these shifts happen in our waking hours. As I explained earlier, I had one of these shifts in the dream state. It was while I was asleep that I was able to draw the line and bring that conviction into my waking life.
Become a master of shifting yourself with the small things so that when the time comes for those larger opportunities to break free and expand you’re ready to take the leap.
Continued Blessings,
Graham
What cycle have you broken free from? What have you learned about yourself through the process?
New Writing Every Week
Interested in receiving a new piece of inspirational writing every week with video commentary? Join the community 👇🏼
New Podcast with Donny Mac
Text Message Updates!
If you live in the USA or Canada you can send me a text at 250-999-4163 and I will add you to my list for updates.
Graham, this letter is so, so good. So well written and meaningful. You always talk about the value of integrity and that's the line I had to draw - tolerating lack of integrity. When I finally said, "that's enough", it led to a major shift in my life. I started sleeping at night. My guilt and anxiety became non-existent. I walked away from compromise. Not easy to do, but so freeing. Please keep sharing - you have a teacher's heart and we're all learning valuable lessons that God is giving you.
I identify so much with your writing here. In fact, it could be written for me! My process the past few months has been exactly this. I had gone from being a bubbly outgoing fun person to experiencing some really low moments that incapacitated me completely. I sort of shut down inside - it has taken some major inner work an attack of covid and a scary intrusive nedical procedure to shake me out of it. There's something about reaching a low point that can snap you back into the real world. I totally appreciate the 3 steps you shared and also the video clip too. I believe I can hear your heart ❤ in all of this, and so I want to thank you for your bravery in sharing. It is so important that we all become vulnerable and support each other through this difficult process. I thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤
You are very special to so many of us here.